yay, no baby!

that's the only blessing of getting your period every month - at least you know you're not pregnant. not that it would be as astronomically wrong to be pregnant with jon's baby as it would have been to be pregnant with will's baby. but no baby, and i'm doing my happy no baby dance.

woo.

ok, i'm going to stop talking about babies now, because they make me nervous.

but i will talk about jon, since he doesn't make me nervous at all. he makes me squishy and mushy and sparkly. and that's a good thing.

what about joe, you ask. well, about joe. joe is a scared little rabbit and i would eat him alive. roar. since he can talk to other people about what happened, but refuses to talk to me about it, all i have to say is... "i'm sleeping with a burly, bald drummer who makes me squishy and mushy and sparkly so ha ha ha mr. joe, i'm happy and you should be jealous and kicking yourself in the ball sack for not hitting this shit while you could have!"

or something like that.

long story short, joe just wants to be my friend, and that is absolutely fabulous in my opinion. yes, i do have feelings for him, but it all goes back to the first of many conversations meghan and i had in her bed concerning this topic. i am like the dragon from shrek while joe is like the donkey. just not a natural combination. he'd want to wait an obscene amount of time before having sex, and i'd just end up devouring him.

so we will remain friends. uncomfortable friends, though, since he won't talk to me about it and i am a spiteful person who refuses to give in and bring it up.

but i really like jon, which is strange. i feel like a girl, which is also strange. he went to north carolina today to see his older sister and won't be home until monday. therefore, i won't be able to see him until next weekend and that makes me so sad that i want to vomit all over myself for being such a fucking girl. blah.

but, uh, yeah. i like me some squishy, mushy, sparkly, starry, shiny, sugar-coated, hot pink, kissy-faced, sexified, all the change in my pocket, all the stars in the sky, all the apples on the tree, please sir may i have some more... jon.

breathe.