ok, ok i admit it. i am addicted to the style network. everyday, in my many, many moments of idleness, i find myself pushing in the 5 and 8 buttons on my remote control. and there it is.

katie brown, although she has the most godforsakenly annoying lisp, does know how to dress a table for romance. and that lynda lopez from "glow", even though a VH1 dropout, really knows her stuff. while i find jane buckingham to be a little old for her job, her topics on "the modern girl's guide to life" always strike a chord in me, whether it be a heated discussion on how to feign knowledge of literary classics at a cocktail party [even though i don't need to] or a thorough explanation of how to measure the perfect portion of meat you should have by using the palm of your hand. and then there's "stripped," the crowning achievment of the style network, which never fails to get my loins a-quivering.

of course, there are a few shows i couldn't care less about [forever nigela? what the fuck is that?], but it never fails to entertain me.

hey, ya know what, laugh all you want. at least i know how to wear blue eyeshadow without looking like i stepped out of the 80s. and i know where hawaiian tropic dark tanning oil comes from. i can set a romantic mood with just a few yards of hot pink organza, a little grosgrain ribbon, and some red fringe. i know where to find fabulous power suits for under $200. i revel in the discovery that i do not have combination skin - i am the victim of a dry top layer and a lower, oilier layer of skin - and i know exactly how to take care of it. i am left with an expensive lust for a $55 bottle of nars bodyglow, a renewed passion for the polka dots in my wardrobe, and a hunger to learn more. i have instructed my mother exactly how to go about buying my birthday present by leading her to my wish list at sephora. i, in summation, have a reinvigorated interest in myself.

ah, what fun being a girl can be.

the best part is that i'm not shallow. i don't need any of this to love myself, but i'll be damned if it won't make me squeal and let my foot pop up like the pink-loving little girl i used to be.

tee hee.

i'm so ridiculous, i love it. this is what happens when i have too much time on my hands.